The soothing relaxing aroma of perfumed oils and candles, the smooth and tranquil tones from the background music, the clean fresh sheets on a very comfortable bed, lying back buck naked with a towel around the nakedness waiting for the pain to start! Nope, this is not a scene from 50 Shades of Grey – it’s the monthly grooming session at the expensive Spa! Although – the torture involved is probably close if not more sadistic than a scene with Christian Grey! The lovely soft-spoken lady (who views your girly parts with more scrutiny than your Gynaecologist) standing at the bottom of the bed readying the torture material to rid you of any unsightly excess hair!
As a modern-day woman, there are many things we do on a regular basis to make ourselves presentable to the outside world. The daily rituals of painting our faces, taming our hair and then the meticulous selection and re-selection of our clothes. The weekly dues of facials, manicure’s and pedicure’s. And then there is the monthly grooming practice that only you and whomever has the privilege of seeing your butt (pun intended) naked self will get to admire!
I asked a number of ladies on why they put themselves through all of this, and whether it was for the benefit of being attractive or desirable to the mate they are trying to attract? Believe it or not, the belief of beautifying ourselves for the reasons of attraction is a little old-fashioned. Most women I asked had said that it makes them feel younger, more vibrant and more energised when they look and feel good about themselves. It is like the new power suit for the modern woman. These rituals all combine to form a woman who stands taller, exudes confidence and is that much more attractive because they project an image of believing in themselves!
The male grooming regime seems a little less strenuous! We touched upon the metro-sexual male in a previous blog, they do exist! They tend to take meticulous care of their skin, hair, body and clothes. Then there is the other end of the spectrum! In truth – most men rock the “I don’t have a care in the world look” consisting of shorts/track bottoms, threadbare T-shirts, flip-flops/bare feet, 2+ day old facial hair growth (or a perma one) and dishevelled bed hair! However, with a simple shower, a razor on the brillo pad chin, clean clothes and a splash of scent and the finished product is good to go! The body grooming side is less prominent. Apart from various forms of exercise for body sculpting and general health, the rest of the body is normally kept pretty much as nature intended!
All that being said, the idea of male grooming is not as taboo a topic as we women think it is! Statistics say that 20% of men in the US rising to the levels of 50% of men in Germany would frequently groom themselves south of the neck line. In fact the US Army state in the Soldier’s Guide that “Hygiene and Grooming” on a daily basis is an indication of a disciplined soldier that demonstrates respect for others and for the uniform! The British Army calls it “Manscaping”! So how has this new practice not dribbled down to the knowledge of most of the men around us?
I am surrounded by male friends who are of varying degrees of hairiness, from the bare chest but light dusting on the arms and legs, right through to the almost ape-like hairy shoulders and back type of fella. A particular friend asked a favour of me – would I be willing to help shave his back (obviously because he can’t reach it!) – this triggered a joking reaction from me of “only if it is with wax strips and not an electric shaver”. For some reason my sadistic alter ego came through! I have this inner devil that seems to want to cause my male friends pain when it comes to hairiness! Past conversations (normally alcohol involved!), if for some random reason went in the direction of hair or hairiness, I would find myself unconsciously plucking the arm hairs of my fellow male friends – PAINFULLY!
Ahhh…. Don’t start judging me too early! A lot of women have that same inner devil!
Recently, I was to help organise a charity event in aid of an extremely worthy cause. As this was supposed to be a fun Corporate event and wanting to include as many of the staff as possible, one of the ideas that cropped up was a sponsored chest and leg hair shaving for the guys. Again, jokingly, a number of women thought up a way to make this even more fun was to do the hair removal in the form of wax strips! Donors could pay extra to have the privilege of inflicting the pain of pulling of the wax strips! It was riotous laughter from all the ladies in the office! Each woman sporting an evil glint in their eyes as they were envisaging ripping a wax strip, SLOWLY, from a male colleague taking part in the event! Whereas the men were gulping nervously at the image of their tortured delicate skin and wanting to back out of the event altogether!
Maybe this is payback for all the pain that women suffer just to look acceptable in the modern world. It’s a cruel world we live in; Mono-brows and bearded/moustached women are snickered at. So instead of being bitter, we try to take it out on the men – albeit, all in the name of FUN – as our inner devils come out to play!
In the meantime – the legs are apart while warm wax is poured and our monthly torture at the hands of that sweet woman in the Spa works her wonders! *sigh*
And just as a final treat for the ladies – here’s a video of Girlfriends giving their Men a Bikini wax!! Enjoy!
